In recent years, a wave of so-called “Geh Geh” relationship teachings has gained attention on social media platforms, offering controversial advice on love, marriage, and family life. While many young people find these statements entertaining, relationship experts warn that blindly applying such doctrines can spell doom for otherwise healthy unions.
Below are four of the most common “Geh Geh” teachings and why they are dangerously misleading.
1. “Your wife is only interested in your success. Don’t tell her your financial struggles else she will leave you for another man.”
This philosophy is rooted in suspicion and distrust. It suggests that women are incapable of loyalty once hardship sets in. In reality, many women have quietly supported their husbands through financial storms, sometimes even keeping families afloat without announcing their sacrifice. Building walls around financial transparency prevents trust and intimacy from growing. Experts argue that hiding struggles in fear of abandonment only widens the emotional gap between partners.
2. “If you open a business for your wife, make sure it’s in your name and under your control. Once she becomes financially independent, she will leave you.”
This teaching reveals more about insecurity than wisdom. Financial independence should be seen as a strength, not a threat. A wife who earns her own income often contributes significantly to family stability, especially during unforeseen setbacks such as job losses, illness, or emergencies. Stifling her independence in the name of control not only limits her potential but also weakens the overall resilience of the household.
3. “Women should be the ones paying dowry for men, because they need more men.”
This claim dismisses cultural heritage and trivializes the symbolism of marriage rites. Across Nigerian traditions, the payment of bride price is a deeply respected gesture of responsibility and honor, symbolizing a man’s readiness to care for his new family. Suggesting a reversal is not only impractical but also disregards centuries of cultural values that define the sanctity of marriage. Relationships thrive on mutual respect, not distorted interpretations of gender roles.
4. “Have many girlfriends and make relationships purely transactional.”
Arguably the most destructive of the “Geh Geh” philosophies, this teaching encourages infidelity and dishonesty. Treating relationships as transactional strips love of trust, loyalty, and dignity. Promiscuity breeds secrecy, jealousy, and eventual heartbreak. True intimacy cannot flourish in an environment where partners are reduced to financial exchanges or temporary pleasures.
Relationship counselors emphasize that while every marriage has its challenges, adopting these toxic generalizations only fuels insecurity and erodes love. Building a lasting union requires trust, communication, respect, and loyalty not fear-driven ideologies packaged as modern wisdom.
In the words of one marriage coach: “When couples build on honesty and shared values, their bond becomes unshakable. But when they sow seeds of suspicion and selfishness, the relationship is already halfway to destruction.”
At the heart of it, love is not a transaction, and marriage is not a battleground. Couples who ignore the “Geh Geh” noise and focus on genuine partnership stand a better chance at creating homes where love and respect truly thrive.