The controversy surrounding Nigerian singer Habeeb Okikiola, popularly known as Portable, continues to trend, particularly after his recent altercation with Queen Dami, one of his partners and the former wife of the late Alaafin, Oba Lamidi Adeyemi. This isn’t the first time Portable has been involved in public disputes with his lovers, but this particular case has gained attention due to Queen Dami's notable background.
Unfortunately, Portable's actions exemplify traits often associated with a lack of decency. Such behaviors highlight the importance of understanding what makes a man truly decent. According to psychology, a decent man consistently demonstrates certain qualities that set him apart, not just in his actions but in his character.
Here are eight essential traits of a decent man, as outlined by psychological insights and advice from Tina Fey's article:
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1. Empathy
Empathy goes beyond simply hearing others’ problems; it’s about deeply understanding and sharing their feelings.
A decent man steps into others’ shoes without fear of vulnerability. This emotional intelligence enables him to connect on a deeper level. Empathy isn’t just a sign of kindness; it reflects his ability to genuinely care.
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2. Honesty
Honesty is more than telling the truth; it’s about doing what’s right, even when no one is watching.
For example, someone who finds a lost wallet and takes the effort to return it showcases integrity. A truly honest man values trust and upholds his principles, even in challenging situations.
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3. Respectfulness
A decent man values the feelings, thoughts, and experiences of others.
Respect transcends politeness; it’s about treating everyone with dignity, regardless of their status or background. In many cultures, respect is deeply ingrained, demonstrating its universal importance.
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4. Responsibility
Taking ownership of actions and their consequences is a hallmark of responsibility.
A decent man doesn’t shift blame or make excuses. He faces his commitments with reliability and maturity, proving he can be trusted to lead and make decisions.
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5. Compassion
Compassion involves not just feeling for someone but actively wanting to ease their pain.
A compassionate man goes out of his way to support others, offering help when needed and standing by them in difficult times. His care strengthens his relationships and brings people closer.
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6. Patience
Patience is the ability to remain calm and composed, even during trying times.
A decent man understands that good things take time and avoids acting impulsively. This trait reflects emotional strength and maturity, especially in moments of adversity.
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7. Integrity
Integrity is about adhering to moral principles and doing the right thing, regardless of external pressures.
A man with integrity stays true to his values, aligning his actions with his words. This builds trust and earns him respect in all areas of life.
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8. Humility
Humility is often misunderstood, but it’s a sign of strength, not weakness.
A humble man recognizes his limitations and values the contributions of others. He avoids arrogance and remains grounded, no matter his achievements.
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Why These Qualities Matter
These traits define a man who isn’t just decent but also capable of fostering healthy relationships and inspiring respect. Unlike the controversy-ridden actions of figures like Portable, a truly decent man elevates himself and those around him, making the world a better place.